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  • The Sex Scholar


    Decades before Kinsey, Stanford professor Clelia Mosher polled   Victorian-era women on their bedroom behavior—then kept the  startling results under wraps.

  • Ultimately, Mosher's story is deeply ironic: She was a staunch feminist who remained aloof from sisterhood, a woman who rigorously researched sexuality and marriage yet probably experienced neither, a pioneering scholar who longed for recognition but did not live to enjoy it.

  • I wish I had had the vocabulary earlier to articulate that sometimes I don't need to be right (in fact, often I know what I'm saying or interpreting is absolutely ridiculous!), but I do need someone who will validate and affirm they understand and support that I have those feelings to help me work through them. And I need the validation from the kind of person who does not know how or does not want to give it to me. It's really key for me- and it comes from parents who loved me (and I always knew it intellectually, but didn't often feel it) but invalidated my feelings from a pretty early age too. It's funny that when in instances where I get that validation early on, I am currently discovering I need it less than I thought I did. I've noticed this in my professional life, but never connected the dots before. I tend to choose people who are more passive about their lives- and I want to activate them, but at the same time I value that they can just be calm and live in the moment more than I can.
May 21, 15

Kinda summarizes the vibe I got which kept me from watching GOT and now happy that I didn't. Probably would have messed me up quite a bit.

  • So why don’t we just cut to the chase, here? George R. R. Martin is creepy. He is creepy because he writes racist shit. He is creepy because he writes sexist shit. He is creepy, primarily, because of his TWENTY THOUSAND MILLION GRATUITOUS RAPE AND/OR MOLESTATION AND/OR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SCENES. And I could write a post about those, to be sure. But you know what would be easier? I could just count them. One by one by one.
May 21, 15

This may be a version of the grounding exercise actually, judging by the comments. Would like to maybe watch the video with you (I won't do so here now).

May 21, 15

This is linked to in/relates to the text about MDMA and self-criticism ( ). I try to read more to see if it relates to deconditioning things somehow.

  • Scientific research — and a mountain of anecdotal evidence — already established that MDMA elicits pro-social feelings, such as compassion and a sense of connection with others. This new study suggests that those pro-social feelings can also be directed at oneself.
  • In the study, twenty recreational MDMA users participated in psychotherapy sessions on two occasions — once having consumed MDMA and once having not consumed it. During the sessions, the participants listened to three guided compassionate imaginary exercises through headphones for about 18 minutes. The exercises were designed to direct compassionate feelings towards the self by having participants imagine the “ideal compassionate being” and then imagine themselves interacting with it.

    The researchers found that self-criticism dropped by 10 points on average after the compassionate imaginary exercises. But the use of MDMA appeared to double the effectiveness of the exercises. The researchers found a 21-point decrease when the exercises occurred after MDMA use.

  • “The unique subjective and interpersonal-affiliative effects of ecstasy seem to be accompanied by a facilitation of positive intrapersonal relating, potentially allowing individuals who typically attempt to ward off compassionate feelings to apprehend the hated, feared or wounded parts of the personality with gentleness and understanding,” Kamboj and his colleagues wrote. “This type of approach-motivation towards enfeebled aspects of the self simply mirrors intentional empathic behaviour between individuals, directed at relieving another’s suffering.”

    • Jungian psychologist and writer Marie-Louise von Franz identified five stages of projection:

      1. The person is convinced that the inner, unconscious experience is truly outer.
      3. The person gradually recognizes a discrepancy between the reality and the projected image.
      5. The person is required to acknowledge the discrepancy.
      7. The person is driven to conclude that he was somehow in error originally.
      9. The person must search for the origin of the projected energy within himself.

      Only by “rendering the contents of the projections conscious” does a person take “a large step toward emancipation from childhood” and into the real, conscious, adult self (Hollis 32).

  • My question today is: What’s your fairy tale? What story in your life begins with “Once upon a time,” and what happiness depends on a Prince Charming to manifest? What was the last event that made you seethe, and what story did you tell yourself about it?

  • First, you will have to deal with this core issue the rest of your life, and at best you will manage to win a few skirmishes in your long uncivil war with yourself. Decades from now you will be fighting on these familiar fronts, though the terrain may have shifted so much that you may have difficulty recognizing the same old, same old.

  • Despite their influence in the 17th century, the era’s women thinkers are absent from historical anthologies of philosophical works. A group of scholars is trying to change that.

  • 17.11.15
    o2 sheperd´s bush empire
  • 11.12.15

  • Through Pathways to Impact we want to encourage you to explore, from the outset and throughout the life of your project and beyond, who could potentially benefit from your research and what you can do to help make this happen.
  • Public engagement may be included as one element of your Pathway to Impact. Engaging the public with your research can improve the quality of research and its impact, raise your profile, and develop your skills. It also enables members of the public to act as informed citizens and can inspire the next generation of researchers.

  • The UK is the first country to attempt to allocate funding based on the wider societal impact of research.
  • However, we don’t really know what the norms are or should be; Rand Europe has explored the time lag from research finding to impact within different areas of biomedical science and found that it is around 15-20 years.

  • So why do I talk about the benefits of failure? Simply because failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me. Had I really succeeded at anything else, I might never have found the determination to succeed in the one arena I believed I truly belonged. I was set free, because my greatest fear had been realised, and I was still alive, and I still had a daughter whom I adored, and I had an old typewriter and a big idea. And so rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.
  • So given a Time Turner, I would tell my 21-year-old self that personal happiness lies in knowing that life is not a check-list of acquisition or achievement. Your qualifications, your CV, are not your life, though you will meet many people of my age and older who confuse the two. Life is difficult, and complicated, and beyond anyone’s total control, and the humility to know that will enable you to survive its vicissitudes.
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