death - Elena LaVictoire on Diigo

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Grief and Homeschooling

A very good article about how grief is mishandled in our society and how the natural losses of a family can really be beautifully incorporated into homeschooling. This is an excellent essay!

Tags: grief, death, sadness on 2008-11-04 -All Annotations (5) -About

more fromwww.cardamompublishers.com

Grief is normal and natural. If we weren’t deeply
affected by the loss of someone we loved, how much could we really have loved
them? It would be weird if we could go about our lives as if nothing had
happened. And yet to children, that’s often how it appears, because they are
separated from their families on a daily basis by school. They don’t see the
grieving that goes on while they are gone.
Contrast this with the experience of a friend of mine.
After several years of hemming and hawing over homeschooling, she finally bit
the bullet one August and pulled her 3rd and 5th grade children out of
school. Only a few weeks into their new life as homeschoolers, she received
terrible news: her father had been diagnosed with terminal cancer.
     Since the children were no longer enrolled in public
school, the three of them were able to fly to the eastern state where he
lived. They spent the next three months caring for him there. The children
were able to get to know their grandpa in a way that, up until then,
geographic distance had never allowed. My friend spent far more time with her
father than she had since leaving for college many years earlier. Those three
months were a tremendous blessing to all of them.

        Sadly, her father passed away shortly after Christmas.
Needless to say, she and her children did not “do school” that spring.
Instead, they grieved together by sharing thoughts and feelings about their
father and grandfather, and reliving the many memories they made during those
precious last three months with him.

        No, they di
do any math that year. But they learned
far more important lessons, and they learned them with their mother. Once
they become adults, they will have a tremendous advantage in that they will
know how to grieve and that it’s ok to do so. Most of the adults our grief
support group works with do not have that knowledge. They come to us
completely bewildered about what they are going through. They are in
tremendous pain, made worse because they’ve bottled up their grief,
encouraged by family and friends who are uncomfortable seeing them cry or
repeat over and over stories about the loved one they lost.
While locking our children up in the artificial
environment of school prevents them from living in the real world,
homeschooling lets them live a genuine life, complete with love, laughter,
and yes, sometimes grieving. If every child learned at home, maybe someday
there would no longer be a need for grief support groups.

Deputy: Grave robbery evidence to undergo DNA test

more information on the grave robbing of Baby Locke.

Tags: death, grief on 2008-10-31 -All Annotations (0) -About

more fromwww.startribune.com

Small bone found near Wisconsin gravesite where baby's remains stolen - TwinCities.com

Baby's remains stolen from Wisconsin cemetery

Something else for mother's of loss to worry about.

Tags: death, grief on 2008-10-30 -All Annotations (0) -About

more fromwww.startribune.com

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Reverend Run, Wife Open Up About Losing Baby - Rev Run : People.com

A brave couple keeps going for their family and also shows that grief is a very personal thing, different for each mom and dad.

Tags: stillbirth, grief, death on 2008-07-22 -All Annotations (0) -About

more fromwww.people.com

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Helping a Family Through the Loss of a Baby

Many people don't know what to say or do for a couple going through this. Here are some words of wisdom.

Tags: stillbirth, pregnancy, grief, death, loss on 2008-07-22 -All Annotations (0) -About

more fromwww.naturalchildbirth.org

encourage the family to hold their baby when possible. It is heartbreaking, but it is the only chance that they will every have. When our son died, our parents didn't hold him because they didn't know if it would be all right. They will never get that chance again. Of course, the birth attendant should treat the baby with the same respect that would be shown to a live baby. Wrap the baby in blankets, hold him/her gently, and support the baby's head. This will encourage the family to hold and bond with their child. Even if the child didn't make it to term, encourage the family to name the child.
Encourage the family to take a couple of rolls of pictures of the baby. Pictures may include the baby wrapped in blankets, the baby unwrapped, any parts of the baby that are attractive (hands, feet, ears), the baby held by the mother and/or father, a picture of the baby's hand resting on the mother's and/or father's hand. Be sure that something in the pictures shows the size of the baby (a hand, a toy, a measuring tape). In our situation, our son was very tiny, but it doesn't show in the pictures.
Listen. Don't interrupt. Don't judge or offer platitudes. Don't tell them that God needed another angel in Heaven. Call the baby by name. Let them cry. Cry with them. Let them know that their baby was important to you, too.
Talk to the father specifically. Don't ask him how his wife is doing. Ask him how he's doing. Hug him and let him know it's okay to be sad. Our society doesn't give him that freedom, so grant it to him at least in your presence.

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Unthinkable Loss: Miscarriage and Stillbirth

One woman's story of coping and grief. What particularly interested me was this lady still feeling grief after five years. This is just something that is not talked or written about much when it comes to stillbirth and fetal demise.

Tags: stillbirth, death, grief on 2008-07-22 -All Annotations (0) -About

more fromwomentodaymagazine.com

Rocks In My Dryer: What I'd Like For You To Know: The Mother Of a Stillborn Child

This would be useful in a little booklet to that grieving parents could hand out, or hospitals and funeral homes could give. Very insightful and helpful!

Tags: grief, death, sadness, stillbirth on 2008-07-22 -All Annotations (0) -About

more fromrocksinmydryer.typepad.com

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When a baby is destined to die - Women's health- msnbc.com

Tags: grief, death, EIFWAL, abortion, mothersloveyourbabies on 2008-07-08 -All Annotations (0) -About

in list: Mothers love your babies

more fromwww.msnbc.msn.com

As Jeanne and her husband, Steve, both Catholics, talked with doctors, they were always clear that they were going to continue the pregnancy. It was against their faith to do otherwise. And they were just as deliberate in planning to parent their son, who they named Robbie, the best way they could, for as long as they could.
In response to the growing number of families struggling with wrenching choices, about 55 perinatal hospice programs have sprung up around the United States in the last decade, says Kuebelbeck, who tracks them on her Web site www.perinatalhospice.org. The programs are designed to provide medical and emotional support for families with a terminal prenatal diagnosis who decide to continue the pregnancy.
Studies don't specifically track how many families in the United States choose to continue the pregnancy after receiving a terminal prenatal diagnosis, but in Shoonveld's experience only between 10 percent and 20 percent of families go on with the pregnancy after hearing the devastating news.
However, a small British study in 2007 found that about 40 percent of families with a terminal prenatal diagnosis decided to continue the pregnancy when perinatal hospice was offered.
Many have family and friends who are mystified as to why a couple would continue a pregnancy knowing their child will die. Loved ones often fear that by continuing on, the parents are simply delaying their grief or torturing themselves. What will they say to strangers who casually ask if the nursery is ready? And what if bringing the baby into this world causes the child suffering?
But for some, the pregnancy feels precious because it may be the only time they’ll get to be with that child, says Schoonveld. “I think most people who have continued want to experience as much time with the baby as possible and want to hopefully meet the baby.
When the child dies, staff can help parents make their memories tangible by cutting a lock of their baby's hair or making hand impressions that parents can run their own fingers over during all the years to come. Horgan also knows the kind of practical, crucial details you never want to have to learn — such as how bathing in warm water can help stave off rigor mortis, buying precious time for parents who want to hold their child’s body.
Nearly a half hour after his birth, when Robbie’s breathing was still imperceptible, Steve bent to show his son to Jeanne’s 92-year-old great aunt Veva Conley and she impulsively reached out to warm Robbie’s foot, turned purple from lack of oxygen. In that instant, everything changed.
Courtesy of Deibert family
Robbie Deibert, the day he was born.
Robbie, presumably startled, took a deep breath. And another. And another. Soon his breathing was normal and his color started to improve. The next day, Stepping Stones helped them arrange to take him home to their light-filled house to live with his 2-year-old big brother, Stevie, for as long as his body would last.

My Domestic Church: Mother's love your babies.

Tags: EIFWAL, mothersloveyourbabies, grief, death, pregnancy on 2008-07-08 -All Annotations (0) -About

in list: Mothers love your babies

more frommydomesticchurch.blogspot.com

Olson Essay on Nabby Adams

The death of Nabby Adams - daughter of John and Abigail from breast cancer.

Tags: history, death, grief on 2008-07-06 -All Annotations (0) -About

more fromwww.shsu.edu

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CaringBridge.org - francescafrisone

Frankie's mom reminds us what Mother's Day is really all about. It is our children that make us Moms! Thank God for every second we have with them!

Tags: grief, death, Frankie, motherhood on 2008-05-12 -All Annotations (0) -About

in list: Grief

more fromwww.caringbridge.org

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Bring The Rain: Clay

Audrey's mom continues to work out her grief with a visit to the cemetery for the first time.

Tags: grief, death on 2008-05-04 -All Annotations (0) -About

more fromaudreycaroline.blogspot.com

Eddie Lincoln

Tags: history, homeschool, homeschooling, Lincoln, grief, death, poetry on 2008-05-01 and saved by2 people -All Annotations (0) -About

in list: Homeschool resources

more fromhome.att.net

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What to do and/or say... - Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep Discussion Forum

Tags: grief, death, miscarriage, stillbirth, pregnancy, loss on 2008-04-17 -All Annotations (0) -About

more fromwww.nowisleep.com

Now I lay Me Down To Sleep - ~Infant Bereavement Photography~

A beautiful site and a helpful service for parents dealing with stillbirth of the death of an infant.

Tags: grief, death, stillbirth on 2008-04-17 -All Annotations (0) -About

more fromwww.nowilaymedowntosleep.org

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History

Nonetheless, the uncertainty and apprehension were evident. It further ingrained my desire to help others. I pray that my role will take more focus as the year unfolds.

Tags: Frankie, VVG, death, grief, motherhood on 2008-02-24 -All Annotations (0) -About