Amy Maxwell's Public Library

Dear Lamberson Family...My name is Judith Adams...and I am a flight attendant for American Airlines...I had the honor of being one of the flight crewmembers on the flight bringing your husband, son, and father's remains..to Chicago, from Philadelphia today...his casket was escourted by a wonderful Seargent named Edwards...(we put him in first class)...He was so attentive, and dignified..it brought us all to tears as he saluted the casket, as it was loaded on the plane..he never left it's side....he also told me later in flight..that it was an "honor" to escourt this man home....I asked him who the soldier was, and he gave me the name...something told me that this Seargent Lamberson was an exceptional person somehow...and I said a small prayer in the galley of the plane alone in flight to Chicago...I am a christian, and I know when the Lord gives me comfort regarding something...and he did about this man I did not know...He is safe in the arms of the Father, and his legacy will live on in the lives of the people he loved...I had to write you and let you know..that whenever something like this happens in our industry....we all take it seriously, and sadly....His remains were treated with the absolute utmost dignity, and respect, ....give my regards to Sge. Edwards....he is a remarkable man himself...you could see the sadness in his eyes regarding this duty...

May the Lord bless you all thru this difficult time...Sometimes it's nice to hear from people you don't even know....who feel your sadness as well.....The entire crew was impacted..We all truly care..


  

Judith Adams (Osteen,, FL)

During my time in his platoon, I observed a man that was worthy of all the respect we could give him. He never ever demanded respect. You just wanted to give it to him. He had a rare kindness, not often enjoyed in the Army. I am fortunate to have spent some time with him here on earth and will try to learn from what I saw in "Sgt. Lamb"

Practitioners must be attuned to the tendency for premature detachment and diminishing communication between patient and caregiver and encourage discussion of fear, loss, and anger.

Raphael noted that for both the patient and caregiver(s) the first response to news of a fatal condition is shock, numbness, disbelief, and denial. In time, the news is faced, distressed feelings can no longer be fended off, and a period of fear, anxiety, and helplessness ensues. Bargaining and the anguish raised by the question "Why me?" mark this phase. Hope may fend off some of the anguish, but as the loss is acknowledged, the process of anticipatory grief may become pronounced. Anger, regret, resentment, a sense of failure, a feeling of being cheated, guilt, and depression are common responses. Some reach the calm and acceptance described by Kübler-Ross. The dying person may withdraw as the family/caregivers struggle with the opposing pulls to remain close to the dying person and to relinquish the bond to the person to mitigate the pain of the impending loss.

This anticipatory grief helps us prepare for such losses.

Right. The danger is that if someone holds on too much then they can’t let the person go. They’re going to have problems, on the other hand, if they detach so much that they end up abandoning the dying person. So it’s got to be a balance between those two processes, which is very difficult.

Absolutely. It’s really preparation for what’s going to happen and beginning to enter that world. Even people who are dying, sometimes, help plan their funerals with their loved ones -- which is a wonderful thing when that can happen -- anticipating what that’s going to be like. It is like a rehearsal for it. You want it, sometimes, to be right. I think a lot of people feel very embarrassed that they have jumped to that next conclusion, that next step of rehearsing that in their minds, and they think there’s something wrong with them.