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17 May 10
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28 Nov 08
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According to the MBTI, introverts get their energy from the internal world of ideas and images, and they feel drained if they spend too much time with people. On the other hand, extraverts (and yes, that IS the correct spelling as used in the MBTI) get their energy from the external world of people and things, and they go crazy if they spend too much time alone. It really has nothing to do with social skills,
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Whether you prefer the internal world or the external world, that preference is fixed
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For Introverts:
1. Indicate to others when you’re busy.
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When an extravert sees you reading, writing, or maybe just thinking, they might assume that the only reason you’d do this is because you don’t have someone to talk to. So they think they’re doing you a favor by striking up a conversation, when they’re actually interrupting.
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Introverts tend to keep most of their thinking to themselves while they’re working out ideas, and not speak much until they’re sure of what they want to say.
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try doing some of your thinking out loud.
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If all else fails, just say you need time to think about it (e.g., “Lisa, this is very interesting, but I’m not sure what to suggest just yet. Let me give it some more thought, and I’ll get back to you.”).
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3. Realize that extraverts often need to talk.
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Because extraverts are more in touch with the external world, for them talking is sometimes as necessary as breathing. They might think out loud by bouncing their thoughts off other people, and they might need to chat in order to boost their energy.
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For an introvert, this can be the most difficult part of dealing with an extravert. The same conversation that energizes the extravert also drains the introvert.
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For Extraverts:
1. Ask if someone is busy before spending time with them.
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. Realize the draining effect a conversation can have on someone.
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4. Remember that introverts need their alone time.
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Perhaps the hardest thing for extraverts to understand about introverts is that someone could actually want to be alone. Not because they don’t like to have fun, or because they hate people, but just because they prefer their internal world, and they need to return to it to be energized. If someone doesn’t want to hang out with you, don’t try to push them, because they just need their “me” time. Of course, there’s always the possibility that they just don’t like you!
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Austin TRegardless of which type you are, you can greatly improve your relationships by learning to get along better with people of the other type. Here are some tips for getting started.
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