This link has been bookmarked by 228 people . It was first bookmarked on 02 Aug 2006, by Dennis Mercado.
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kevinoadvocating Object-Oriented Programming is like advocating Pants-Oriented Clothing
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Action is what gives life its spice
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Sarah E"Classes are really the only modeling tool Java provides you. So whenever a new idea occurs to you, you have to sculpt it or wrap it or smash at it until it becomes a thing, even if it began life as an action, a process, or any other non-"thing" concept."
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Meghan HutchinsReally good story about Object Oriented vs Functional Languages
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08 Dec 13
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Our thoughts are filled with brave, fierce, passionate actions
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Our freedom comes precisely from our ability to do things.
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In the Kingdom of Javaland, where King Java rules with a silicon fist, people aren't allowed to think the way you and I do. In Javaland, you see, nouns are very important, by order of the King himself. Nouns are the most important citizens in the Kingdom. They parade around looking distinguished in their showy finery, which is provided by the Adjectives, who are quite relieved at their lot in life. The Adjectives are nowhere near as high-class as the Nouns, but they consider themselves quite lucky that they weren't born Verbs.
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On the other side of the world is a sparsely inhabited region in whose kingdoms Verbs are the citizens of eminence. These are the Functional Kingdoms, including Haskellia, Ocamlica, Schemeria, and several others. Their citizens rarely cross paths with the kingdoms near Javaland. Because there are few other kingdoms nearby, the Functional Kingdoms must look with disdain upon each other, and make mutual war when they have nothing better to do.
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ghost-dogHello, world! Today we're going to hear the story of Evil King Java and his quest for worldwide verb stamp-outage.1
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thattommyhall
Even if you don't think in English, you still probably still thought of a similar set of actions, except in your favorite language. Regardless of the language you chose, or the exact steps you took, taking out the garbage is a series of actions that terminates in the garbage being outside, and you being back inside, because of the actions you took. -
10 Mar 12
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Our freedom comes precisely from our ability to do things.
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14 Dec 11
Romain Pouclet@timothee_martin Les modèles anémiques en Java dont on discutait hier : http://t.co/zOhUyDWn //cc @zenklys
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feis kontrolRant on what happens when you take object-oriented programming too seriously
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05 Sep 11
rishabh Sharmahis story does not have a happy ending. It is neither a story for the faint of heart nor for the critical of mouth. If you're easily offended, or prone to being a disagreeable knave in blog comments, please stop reading now.
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In the Kingdom of Javaland, where King Java rules with a silicon fist, people aren't allowed to think the way you and I do. In Javaland, you see, nouns are very important, by order of the King himself. Nouns are the most important citizens in the Kingdom. They parade around looking distinguished in their showy finery, which is provided by the Adjectives, who are quite relieved at their lot in life. The Adjectives are nowhere near as high-class as the Nouns, but they consider themselves quite lucky that they weren't born Verbs.
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In Javaland, by King Java's royal decree, Verbs are owned by Nouns. But they're not mere pets; no, Verbs in Javaland perform all the chores and manual labor in the entire kingdom. They are, in effect, the kingdom's slaves, or at very least the serfs and indentured servants. The residents of Javaland are quite content with this situation, and are indeed scarcely aware that things could be any different.
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23 Apr 11
Avinash MeetooHello, world! Today we're going to hear the story of Evil King Java and his quest for worldwide verb stamp-outage. 1
Caution: This story does not have a happy ending. It is neither a story for the faint of heart nor for the critical of mouth. If you're ejava programming humor language design oop development functional rant software code geek essay comparison
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"Dude, not everything is an object."
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The Verb "execute", and its synonymous cousins "run", "start", "go", "justDoIt", "makeItSo", and the like, can perform the work of any other Verb by replacing it with an appropriate Executioner and a call to execute(). Need to wait? Waiter.execute(). Brush your teeth? ToothBrusher(myTeeth).go(). Take out the garbage? TrashDisposalPlanExecutor.doIt(). No Verb is safe; all can be replaced by a Noun on the run.
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There's rarely any need in these kingdoms to create wrapper nouns to swaddle the verbs. They don't have GarbageDisposalStrategy nouns, nor GarbageDisposalDestinationLocator nouns for finding your way to the garage, nor PostGarbageActionCallback nouns for putting you back on your couch. They just write the verbs to operate on the nouns lying around, and then have a master verb, take_out_garbage(), that springs the subtasks to action in just the right order.
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In the Functional Kingdoms, Nouns and Verbs are generally considered equal-caste citizens. However, the Nouns, being, well, nouns, mostly sit around doing nothing at all. They don't see much point in running or executing anything, because the Verbs are quite active and see to all that for them. There are no strange laws mandating the creation of helper Nouns to escort each Verb, so there are only exactly as many Nouns as there are Things in each kindgom.
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I do not think the rant was against OOP... the rant was against Java's interpretation of OOP. In their interpretation, actions are turned into verbs unnecessarily. Factories, proxies, and enablers litter the landscape with verbal garbage.
Other languages manage to be object oriented without spiraling down into object fetishism like Java has.
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09 Jul 10
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If a Verb is to be seen in public at all, it must be escorted at all times by a Noun.
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The Verb "execute", and its synonymous cousins "run", "start", "go", "justDoIt", "makeItSo", and the like, can perform the work of any other Verb by replacing it with an appropriate Executioner and a call to execute(). Need to wait? Waiter.execute(). Brush your teeth? ToothBrusher(myTeeth).go(). Take out the garbage? TrashDisposalPlanExecutor.doIt(). No Verb is safe; all can be replaced by a Noun on the run.
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Classes are really the only modeling tool Java provides you. So whenever a new idea occurs to you, you have to sculpt it or wrap it or smash at it until it becomes a thing, even if it began life as an action, a process, or any other non-"thing" concept.
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David Creelmanhttp://lists.squeakfoundation.org/pipermail/squeak-dev/1998-October/017019.html
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David CorkingThe nursery rhyme looks familiar, but how realistic is it? Smalltalk and Self appear at first glance to be in danger of this kind of horror, especially Smalltalk where every object has a class, yet a Smalltalk statement consists largely of verbs.
Yegge seems to have missed an important detail in his analogy - verbs are not functions - they are symbols (selectors) that resolve to a function (method) when they are looked up (depending on ... whatever - Smalltalk the class of the receiver, CLOS the types of the arguments and so on). C and FORTRAN don't have verbs, they just have functions (actions).-
For the lack of a horseshoe,
EquestrianDoctor.getLocalInstance().getHorseDispatcher().shoot(); -
the stories all take a definite shape: object construction is the dominant type of expression, with a manager for each abstraction and a run() method for each manager. With a little experience at this kind of conceptual modeling, Java citizens realize they can express any story in this style.
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05 Mar 09
Guy FawkesHello, world! Today we're going to hear the story of Evil King Java and his quest for worldwide verb stamp-outage. Caution: This story does not have a happy ending. It is neither a story for the faint of heart nor for the critical of mouth. If you're easi
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Of course our thoughts are also filled with nouns. We eat nouns, and buy nouns from the store, and we sit on nouns, and sleep on them. Nouns can fall on your head, creating a big noun on your noun. Nouns are things, and where would we be without things?
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